Saturday, December 02, 2006
Wintertide Celebration
Emma and I invited Grandma out for a quick visit to a couple of places for the local Wintertide celebration today. Wintertide here is so puny there's hardly anything happening at all. We did get invited to an open house for some local caterers, so of course we're going to hit the free food. I always buy something from them anyway, so I don't have to suffer from moocher guilt.

Grandma and Emma...

The Majors gave us some goodies they were trying to unload to make more room in their new house. One thing we scored was a car for Emma. We can't use it at home because the terrain is too rough around here. Look at where M chose to use it...

For the Majors
Thank you for the rugs, and for everything else. We ended up using the smaller rug. M made a backing for it out of some underflooring we had left from the laminate job. I thought I would miss my hardwood floor, but it was actually nice to have some padding under our feet again. It fit with our meager decor perfectly. Thank you!

Advent Smarties/Transitions
For the first time in over fifteen years my advent calendar is not sporting Hershey Kisses. This year we've turned it over to Emma. It now sports Smarties. She likes Smarties and I've decided they're the perfect candy for her because she gets a whole bunch at once and they don't melt all over place. The years of sharing the Hershey Kisses with M, him taking the odd days and me taking the even days, are over. Somehow it doesn't even seem sad.

How much is your blog worth II?
Look! In just over a year it's value has almost doubled! Woo hoo! Still haven't gotten my check though.

My blog is worth $7,339.02.
How much is your blog worth?

Search engine fun!
It's time for another edition of...what were people searching when they landed on my blog?

He's a lumberjack - And he's OK. We know.
Emma, Leesburg - Actually, she stayed home with Popi for that trip.
opus ornament - Fear not, there will be more ornaments this year!
torpedo tits - Now correct me if I'm wrong...but aren't torpedo tits something that are forced upon you? Do people actually go and search for these?
trunk decorating - See the site I created, Trunk or Treat Decorating. There so much more there.
70's Deco - This is one blog where it has NOT come back.
poems on a sweet cute gal - And you found Emma? Awwww.
videorama - This actually takes you to an Emma video. Will wonders never cease?
telecheck reason 88 - These bastards must be screwing people over a lot. I get a lot of hits for this.
TJ Maxx Elves Pictures - This actually referred to the post on this page from this weekend. The wonders of Google.
miramar schwimmbad - Those people really ought to be paying me.
potato meat stone heidelberg - What you're looking for is Die Kartoffel and it's actually in Ladenburg.
charmbracelet - My charm bracelet has it's own web following.
wear bib - Till she's 18, I'm thinking.
"expanding butt" - Yes, to see an expanding butt please see Highland Gal, thanks!
baboon butt - Sorry, it's only expanding, it's not actually red.
POPI's CD cover - He must be hiding those residual checks from Noni.
Mylicon for dog gas - Are you kidding me!?! Something can be done about dog gas!?!
That way! This way!
We drive through town to get to the babysitters. That takes literally thirty seconds here. We cross main street and head back out of town to get to her house. Lately, in the evening when I pick Emma up she wants to go to town. When we cross the street she points up the main street (towards Daddy's store) "That way! That way!" I tell her no, we're going this way. "That way! That way!" This lasts till we're at least a good four miles out of town. She gets mad when I don't listen, too.
I can't imagine who she gets her bossiness from...
Daddy brought in the tree box from the truck this evening. I'm sure he told Emma what was in there. She demanded he open it. "Open it! Open it! Open it!" Since I've already spent almost thirteen years training him, he complied immediately ;)

Thursday, November 30, 2006
South Park Redux
Come on, people! Is there not one person who reads this blog who can tell me who M's character resembles??? Please don't disappoint me here.

And...I had another song banging on my brain today from the Christmas album. It was...The Most Offensive Song Ever. I am not even going to allude to what it's about. But any of you who have Mary's in your lives will know my angst ;)

UPDATE: I stupidly did not share the link for making your own South Park character. Here you go: I think it's awesome other fans are coming out of the woodwork.

One more thing...Regarding M's character, you're supposed to be guessing a real person.
Brokeback Mountain
I finally saw it last night. It was on HBO. I didn't seek it out, but once it started I thought I'd hang with it a while to see where it went. I ended up staying up way too late to finish it.

My was depressing. Not in the "why won't society let us love who we want" way that I was expecting. It was depressing because the characters had to make hard choices in their lives and those choices shut doors to other more desirable options. It was real life.

When the movie first came out I rejected the notion of running out to see it purely on the hype. It was overkill. While the movie itself doesn't bash you over the head with agenda driven propaganda, the advocates of the film sure did. I naturally reject such ridiculous hype.

The movie was cinematically beautiful, as promised. The main characters were most certainly eye candy, and the acting was superb. The actors presented some very subtle and rich performances. Cowboys in love is about what you'd expect, something completely antithetical to the fabulousness of the Queer Eye crowd.

I came away from the film with many questions, foremost of which was "What the hell did he say?" Ennis was hard to understand most of the time; he seemed to swallow most of his words. But when the final line of the movie is incomprehensible, that's just not fair! The other question is the one most people came away with...did Jack die accidentally or was he murdered.

Thankfully, in the internet age I am able to head straight to the computer with my questions. There are forums out there that have rehashed and reexamined every bit of minutiae from the film. I was able to figure out many lines I couldn't understand. The big question is up to interpretation, left intentionally vague by the director. Apparently in the book it's more clear cut...the murder was a product of Ennis's imagination and internalized fears. Many people repudiate that interpretation and insist Jack was gay-bashed. I came to the conclusion that a person's interpretation of that question is a litmus test of their personality. I think Jack died as his wife said, an accident. If you're a conspiracy theorist and prone to see slights against homosexuals around every corner, then you probably think he was murdered.

Anyhow, the "gay parts" didn't squick me. Two hot guys kissing is not a turn off for me. Now maybe if it were Ernest Borgnine and Danny DeVito. Ugh, I think I may puke...
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
South Park stuff
Leslie found can create yourself as a South Park character. M and I have been fans since the first episode, ten seasons ago. I'm not going to write a defense of it. Everyone has their opinion by now and I won't change your mind. We like it because it's biting satire and clever as hell. It's so un-PC it feels like home. Here I am in South Park...

Here's M. He picked all the features. Does he remind you of anyone...?

There is a reason I blogged this today. For a few years our tradition was to listen to the South Park Christmas album on the way home from Thanksgiving, wherever it was. Let me tell have never heard "O Holy Night" till you've heard Cartman sing it. My favorites include Mr. Mackey's "Carol of the Bells" and "A Jew on Christmas." One song stands out because it's original and quite un-holidaylike. Regardless, it's been stuck in my head all day. Here it is for your consideration...
(Imagine it sung in folky style)

Dead, Dead, Dead
by Juan Schwartz

Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday we'll all be dead
The minute we're born we start dying
We die a little more every day
Young or old
Rich or poor
There's nothing we can do to stop it
So look long at that Christmas tree
It may be the last one that you see
Decorate your house in green and red
'Cause someday you'll be dead

Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday we'll all be dead
It might happen in a couple months
Or 50 years from now
But no matter when it happens
It will seem too soon to you
So be sure on Christmas Eve
When you snuggle into bed
That you thank God for your family
'Cause someday they'll be dead

Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday they'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead; Someday we'll all be dead
Who knows how many Christmases are left in their short life?
Nobody knows, thats my point
Enjoy them while you can
And so on Christmas morning
Let good tidings fill your head
What a festive season
Someday you'll be dead

Dead, Dead, Dead Someday we'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead Everyone you know, dead
A Very Merry Christmas to you Dead, Dead, Dead
Merry Christmas Everybody
Fresh pics
But not original. First we have feeding the baby.

And then back to the new tree, very same bulb.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Today's new tree
It's the one in the foreground. M took the frame from the dead tree and pulled all the lights off of it. Then he strung two strings of big C7 1/2 bulbs on it. So every tree in the forest is different.

M took all of tonight's pictures.
Outfit of the day
It's not very often I send her off to Mary's in jeans so I had M take a picture of today's outfit.

Me being me
Yesterday all of the girls went shopping and left the men at the house to do man things. The ladies hit Kohl's, Walmart, Target and TJ Maxx. At Target right now they have a great collection of Hello Kitty stuff in their dollar bins. I picked up some cute little notepads. I gave Emma one to hold on to because she wanted it. She carried it through the checkout line; I had to ask the cashier the scan the other one twice to make sure Emma's was covered because I didn't want to take it away from her.

We moved on to TJ Maxx and I went outside for a moment to look for Noni. When I came back Emma wasn't holding her notepad anymore. SIL didn't really know she had it so she wasn't conscious of keeping up with it. Damn! We had that thing for all of four minutes! I couldn't believe it. I retraced her steps, looking everywhere for it. I figured it had been picked up by then and was lost forever. It was stupid how I mourned that little one dollar Hello Kitty notepad that I'd just bought for Emma.

I tried to let it go and moved on to the Christmas section. I glanced on the floor and there was the empty wrapper for the notepad! Ah hell, someone had found it and planned to keep it. Nice, really nice. I was bummed at the unfairness of life.

I rounded the next corner and what do I spy? A little 4 or 5 year-old clutching Emma's notepad. I had picked up the wrapper and was holding it in my hand showing Noni. She asked if I was going to say something? I thought, should I? Why the hell not!?!

I approached the mother, showed her the wrapper and said,"My little girl dropped her notepad and I believe your daughter picked it up." The girl hugged her mother's leg and buried her face in it. The woman checked her little girl and saw the notepad and took it from her. Then she took the wrapper from me and stuffed the notepad into it and told me "I didn't know" and started to turn away. I realized there might be a language barrier and she was misunderstanding me (I think she thought I was telling her the girl unwrapped an item from that store and was taking it). I said "Wait a minute, that notepad belongs to MY daughter and we'd like to have it back." She handed it back to me and I thanked her. As I turned away I could hear her questioning her daughter about finding the item.

I know I was well within my rights to ask for it back. I understand "finders keepers" and all that, but this was a wrapped item in a store and the girl should be taught that you can't keep something like that anyway. The little girl and the mother didn't know it wasn't a TJ Maxx item.

Even though it wasn't a bad "confrontation" I came away shaking like a leaf. You never know how these things will turn out and I was pumped with adrenaline. It did teach me that when something involves my daughter I have a few more cajones than I used to.
Oddities from the weekend
Emma freaked out at bath time both nights. The second night we had to abort the whole idea because M was afraid she'd hurt herself. She was screaming and flailing. We thought it might be because the shower doors were the sliding kind and she felt boxed in. I was so looking forward to getting her home for bath last night so she'd finally be clean. She started to freak out again. That's when we realized that when she's beyond tired, forget the bath. We gave her a bath this morning.

Emma lasted all of four minutes at the Thanksgiving table. She did a freakout spell there too and I picked her up and carried her into the living room and dumped her on the floor with all the cars. Then I enjoyed a lovely Thanksgiving dinner.
Emma nabs the good chair
Or it swallowed her. I'm not sure which.

Sunday, November 26, 2006
Not THE pic
But a preview of the outfit...

Good news!
I got THE picture for the Christmas card. The bad news is that you'll have to be on my Christmas card list to see it. Here's your last chance to send me your address and be added to the list...