Saturday, July 23, 2005
My Awesome Shopper
She's the best companion for shopping. She loves it! She rides like a princess in her cart cover. She was entranced by the experience from the very beginning. Her eyes would follow the lights, the colors, the smiling faces, the people and the cars. I honestly cannot remember her ever throwing a fit. As long as we honor her feeding schedule she's happy as a clam. She falls asleep in either her stroller or cart cover when she's tired. I don't even want to contemplate the day when my good fortune might end. This child is definitely momma's daughter, her Noni's grandbaby and her great grandmother's legacy.
Haiku II
Fatigue rules each day
Time for sleeping when I'm dead
Where's the Sominex?

Arms flapping wildly
Baby bouncing up and down
Tiggers love to bounce

See related video:
tiggerbounce_0001.wmv
Intimate Knowledge (of a new kind!)
I have never known any person as intimately as I know Emma. I have known her since before she was born. Our introduction was alarming for both of us I suppose. She had lost the world she had known; warm, comforting and secure. I was given the awesome responsibility of taking care of this new person, armed with no real tools except instinct and the books I didn't have time to read.

Since that time I have come to know every inch of her body. Her flawless skin, marred only by the scratches she gives herself with her little toenails. Her fine cornsilk hair, which seems to grow overnight. Her blue, blue eyes, which still amaze me in their unlikelihood. I know her moods, her signals, her sounds. I don't claim to know her mind. That will always be unfathomable.

I point all this out not to gag you with schmaltz, but to press the point that when she does something new I notice it. That's what is so exciting about this phase of development. Every day seems to hold something new, some new achievement, some new discovery that Emma has made.

So what was it that she did today that makes me wax so rhapsodic? She discovered her hair. She learned that when she strokes her hair it feels good. But she doesn't just reach right up and pet herself. She uses a wide sweeping motion and ends with an articulated motion of her fingers. It makes me giggle to watch her.

Of course I took the opportunity to point out to her that she is welcome to pull her own hair instead of mommy's now.
Friday, July 22, 2005
New Mom Haiku
We were goofing off online today and got the idea to write some haikus for our mommy board. I found it to be very fun and entertaining. Now I can't seem to stop. So here is my little collection so far:

Beautiful baby
grinning from your photograph
I could eat you up

I am very tired
chatting keeps me up so late
I should just shut up

Standing by the crib
staring at my miracle
You hold my heart now

Crunching underfoot
Cheerios everywhere
Maybe I should sweep
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Emma's 9 month check-up
It went well. She's

weight 20 lbs. 4 oz. 65th percentile
height 30 inches 97th percentile
weight to height 10th-25th percentile
Hemoglobin 12.9

All good stuff. The part that sucked was the finger stick for the blood test. When we sent the nurse to get the kit Emma was being a crab so it seemed the time. Then her mood brightened and by the time the nurse came back she was playing. So...prick the finger, here comes the blood, squeeze the finger, need more blood, squeeze some more, need some more. It was NOT fun. I think Emma was mostly enraged because the nurse wouldn't let go of her finger. Then it wouldn't stop bleeding. I kept pressing the swab on and the blood kept coming. Blood was getting all over Emma's hands and my hands. The nurse was ready to put on gloves to help us but I managed to get a band aid on. Yuck. Payback for sending M. to all the shot appointments.
Monday, July 18, 2005
Just because it's a cliche doesn't mean it's not true
Everyone said "you'll be a great mom, it's different when it's your own." And so it is.
Now for mundane things i.e. my life
Life right now is pretty exciting. To bring you up to date my nine month old daughter Emma is experiencing a period of rapid discovery. Every day she is achieving something new. Two weekends ago she started crawling. She'd been on the cusp for a month. Two weeks later she's like a little drag racer, zipping across the floor.

We have new language. B's, G's, D's, M's and now N's. Can you believe I'm excited about this stuff?

She waved bye bye Thursday. It was a shock. Her Popi was leaving and she waved at him. We both pointed at her and looked at each other in shock at the same moment.

She's big on mimicry now. So I never know what she'll do next.

She finally started clapping. She loves to clap your hands too. She'll take your fingers and guide them. Tonight she was on the porch with her daddy swinging. I could hear great bursts of laughter from her. I was intensely curious, as the dog is the only one she has found that funny so far. Daddy was clapping his cupped hands, making a "whop, whop, whop" sound. Apparently it was the funniest thing she had heard in awhile.

Every day is a wonder.
Speaking of deviated path
Something most people don't know about me...I've got this narrative going on my head. A parallel life. I live in a big city, I'm single, and I'm doing fabulous things. I'm wallowing in "culcha." It's not a very detailed narrative. It's just a place I go when I want to escape.
Welcome to my blog
I'm blogging. Isn't it obvious? My main motivation is to have a journal of this time in my life and the life of my child. So I certainly hope there is some way to preserve all this!

A Deviated Path is my life right now. It's not what I pictured at all. I was resigned to being childless after seven years of trying. I had my future set in my head; Vegas vacations, occasional travel and year after year of seasonal/annual events to mark the passage of time. That's all changed now. I'm on a new path, motherhood. I didn't think it was for me, truly. Too much required. I don't have it in me. Or so I thought. I'm going to steal a quote from a friend's blog because it truly spoke to me:

"The moment a child is born, a mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." ~ Rajneesh

That's me, something new.